Dark Days/Enlightening Times

Recently, I went through a dark period of extreme self-doubt unlike anything I have ever experienced.  It verged on the edge of self-loathing and bordered on, dare I say: depression, but lets stop just short of that.  Real men don’t get depressed, they just suck it up, right?   Well that didn’t work this time. 

Now,  these dark days were not of biblical proportions nor did they involve life threatening situations.  None the less, they did temporarily steal my sense of self and my normal charming disposition.   An irrational fear gripped me and every rational thought I had eventually succumbed to its power.  Nothing made sense.  I was convinced of my own worthlessness and actually became physically ill.

It wasn’t until after a three day period of fasting and prayer that this “attack” was defeated.  I don’t mean a panic attack, I mean a full blown assault by the powers of darkness.  My best friend believes that whenever we are on the verge of being used in someway that will glorify the Kingdom, that an assault is almost assured.   Please don’t misunderstand me, I do not believe that anything I am capable of doing on my own could bring glory to the Kingdom. 

All I am saying is: “Here I am Lord, Choose me”.

Still seeking, RT 

PUNKs

Once again it is tax season. A time when we stop and reflect on how much our children mean to us.  About $1000 if they are dependents.  That may seem harsh, but as a nation are we truly interested in our children’s well-being?  The influx of PUNKs would suggest not.

Ray Comfort defines PUNKs as pathetic, unwanted, needy kids.  Our society is creating these PUNKs in record numbers.  Parents often take the path of least resistance when raising their children.  Sometimes because they are too self-absorbed.  Other times because they are too busy trying to earn a living in a nation that is giving away the economic base of the masses to profit a few.

Raising a child to be a good person and a productive citizen takes a lot of hard work, sacrifice and yes, even discipline.  Most PUNKs have never learned self-control.  Partially due to the lack of follow through of logical consequences.  As soon as a consequence becomes an inconvenience for the parent, it is often forgotten.  This creates confusion and leads to a disrespect of authority.  Occasionally, for the benefit of the child, parents may need to suffer a little too.

PUNKs have been bombarded by audio-visual stimuli since birth.  This attack on their senses seems to have caused their inability to focus mentally along with an erosion of social etiquette.  Another symptom of this sensual  sortie is academic; PUNKs don’t realize that their stream of consciousness talking and impulsive behavior is negatively effecting their education.  The teacher and anyone else simply become part of the background music/clutter of their lives.

DVDs as babysitters, ten year-olds with cellphones……come on parents.  Think of all the missed oppportunities to really get to know your child and have meaningful dialogue/interaction.  Parents, your child is worth much more than a tax deduction once a year.  They don’t need your money near as much as they do your time.

Thanks for tuning in, RT

Working to maintain a lifestyle I don’t have time to enjoy!

At what point did my American Dream become my American Nightmare, a snare that has tightened it’s strangle hold?  I don’t think I have my wants and needs confused, at least not by US standards.  I am happy with a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food in my stomach and reliable transportation.  My wife and I share a car, which is the topic of a whole other blog.  We pack our lunches, eat out rarely, and are basically homebodies.  If we want to see a movie, we wait until we can rent it.  Our weeks are basically a blur, we see each other briefly before we leave for work a 6:30am and again briefly before bed when I arrive home at 10:30pm.  Our weekends are consumed with keeping up with family,  the house and going to church.  This isn’t the way it is supposed to be, is it?

Not only do I not have time to enjoy what I have, but working also keeps me from doing things I need to do.  I need to spend more time on my knees.  I need to spend more time with my lovely wife.  I need to spend more time with my children and parents.  I need to be more involved and active with my church family.  I need to not be a slave to a perverted American Dream.  I need to be less concerned with US standards and more focused on God’s standards.

But then I say, God, I have already given up expanded basic and am now suffering through with only basic cable.  I have given up one vehicle and am sacrificing by sharing a vehicle.  For pete’s sake, my wine bottle doesn’t even roll.  How much more?   

“It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”

Oh yea, God’s standards, not the worlds.  Is striving for the American Dream keeping me from heavan’s gates?   What else can I give away?  Everything! 

I live in a nation where the average lifestyle seems extravagant or even obscene by outsiders.  Our cities and very lives are designed to promote energy consumption.  This combined with our demand for inexpensive consumer goods and our dividend driven economy is systematically eroding many workers ability to provide for their families.  Education, an institution once valued, is  being rejected by a generation as being irrelevant and archaic. 

I live in and have bought into a nation’s belief system that does not live by God’s standards, but rather by its own.  So what do I need to give away?  Everything that is not of God’s standards.  A simpler life in regards to possessions, but a much richer life in community, relationships and eternity.

Searching, seeking, and sojourning, RT